Wisdom in fragments

These scorecards just lead us down a path of dissatisfaction, when in reality most things that truly matter for happiness can't be measured in any meaningful way. We should be more mindful of living in the moment rather than keeping tally marks that don't really serve us.

Psychologist known for teaching popular "Science of Well-Being" course at Yale

I often joke that social media is the 'NutraSweet' version—it seems good but doesn't deliver the psychological benefit we expect. In fact, our use of technology can be a big opportunity cost on a lot of the stuff that truly matters for happiness.

Psychologist known for teaching popular "Science of Well-Being" course at Yale

I think there's a big misconception—sometimes called 'toxic positivity' or 'good vibes only'—that a happy life is one where we only experience positive emotions. But that's just patently false. Evolutionarily speaking, our negative emotions serve a really important purpose: they cue us to take action.

Psychologist known for teaching popular "Science of Well-Being" course at Yale

So many of the things our culture pushes us to pursue for happiness don't actually work the way we think they will. Material possessions, more money—if you're on social media, you get this strong sense that you should go after more of everything and then you'll feel better.

Psychologist known for teaching popular "Science of Well-Being" course at Yale

I think these are all cases where our brains lie to us. It's not because they're doing something insidious or that there's some advantage to messing up our sense of happiness—it's just the normal processes of our brains sometimes go awry, and we end up not appreciating what we have as much as we could.

Psychologist known for teaching popular "Science of Well-Being" course at Yale

a compelling call to action that will stay with you long after you've turned the last page.

Motivational Speaker & Author of "The 5 Second Rule

a powerful call to action to think deeply about what lights you up—and a guide for how to build a life of meaning and purpose.

Chief Executive Officer of Apple Inc

When you understand that your perception shapes your experience, you stop fearing uncertainty. The fear of 'not knowing' comes from the worry that something bad might happen. But if things aren't inherently good or bad, then not knowing isn't something to be afraid of.

Harvard psychologist & researcher in mindfulness and the psychology of possibility

Most people assume a wound heals at its natural pace. But no—it healed according to perceived time. If the clock ran faster, the wound healed faster. If it ran slower, healing slowed.

Harvard psychologist & researcher in mindfulness and the psychology of possibility

If we treat the mind and body as one unit, then wherever we put the mind, we necessarily put the body—and that opens up enormous possibilities for control.

Harvard psychologist & researcher in mindfulness and the psychology of possibility

The last thing we want is to live like machines. Our research over the past 45+ years shows that when you're actively noticing, your neurons are firing, and that's literally and figuratively enlivening. And what do we do when we're having fun? We notice, we engage. So mindfulness is not just beneficial—it's enjoyable.

Harvard psychologist & researcher in mindfulness and the psychology of possibility

Why does this matter? Because when you're mindless—assuming 1+1 is always 2—you don't notice context, and you don't have choices. But when you're mindful, you do. If someone asks you how much 1+1 is, you get to decide: do I answer 1, 2, 10, or something else? You become aware, engaged, and flexible.

Harvard psychologist & researcher in mindfulness and the psychology of possibility

I want to free everyone from that misconception. You can't know everything. And when you shift from a personal attribution for not knowing—thinking, 'I don't know, but everyone else seems to, so I'll fake it or avoid the situation'—to a universal attribution—realizing, 'I don't know, you don't know, nobody knows'—you stand taller. This allows you to embrace what I believe is the most successful mindset: confident uncertainty.

Harvard psychologist & researcher in mindfulness and the psychology of possibility

Warren Buffett had a phrase I really liked: You want to give your kids enough to do anything but not enough to do nothing. I set up a plan to create wealth for them—and I wildly overshot that.

I felt that civil discourse in America was breaking down, with people splitting into two warring ideological camps. Meanwhile, the real issues we face are far more subtle, nuanced, and complex. I believed society needed what I call a contempt-free zone.

Risk naturally triggers fear—fear of a bad outcome. But using reason to manage risk means applying a more analytical approach, almost like a mathematical assessment of risk and reward. If the odds are against you, how bad is the downside really?