Wisdom in fragments

In my interactions at the Samaritans, I've encountered a recurring theme: many individuals grappling with suicidal thoughts are often trying to navigate through what feels like an irreversible loss of status and the deep-seated need for connection and belonging. This insight underscores the profound impact that a perceived loss in these areas can have on an individual's well-being.

British journalist and author known for investigative reporting and psychology books

This vulnerability we have is like a crack in the human psyche, a gateway through which madness seeps in. The human brain isn't primarily focused on discerning truth. Instead, it's preoccupied with understanding who to align with and what beliefs to adopt to secure connection and status within a given culture.

British journalist and author known for investigative reporting and psychology books

Social media hasn't changed these games; it's merely provided a new platform for them. Virtue status, however, is comparatively accessible, especially within the realms of social media. This ease of gaining virtue status on social media, coupled with our innate desire for status, explains the platform's toxicity. We're drawn to the simplest form of status acquisition, and social media facilitates this with minimal effort.

British journalist and author known for investigative reporting and psychology books

Our brains are adept at concealing our motives from ourselves, convincing us that we are not as interested in status as we might actually be. This self-deception, paradoxically, enhances our ability to argue our lack of interest in status, which, in turn, can ironically increase our standing within the social group. People are drawn to this perceived humility, further entrenching the intricate and ironic dance of status within human society.

British journalist and author known for investigative reporting and psychology books

Status, I believe, is intrinsic to our very being it's at the core of who we are. This quest for status isn't a novel aspect of human behaviour—it's a pursuit that predates our very existence as humans. This pursuit isn't just a facet of our lives; it essentially narrates the story of human existence. The significance of status, of being esteemed and recognised in these respects, cannot be overstated—it's profoundly and fundamentally important to us.

British journalist and author known for investigative reporting and psychology books

I've started using the term 'overwhelming life experience' to describe trauma because it seems to be less daunting for people. When I ask if they've had such experiences, they begin to understand the breadth of trauma.

Based on my experience, I can say that healing is possible without forgiveness. It's perfectly valid for some people to choose never to forgive. There's a prevalent belief that forgiveness is necessary, as if something is wrong with you if you don't forgive. I disagree with this notion.

I used to believe in the concept of permanent healing, but my views have evolved. Nothing is permanent; however, each round of healing lightens our load and elevates us energetically. Life will inevitably reactivate old wounds, but these moments don't engulf us as they once did.

My job is to help people recognise the origins and intentions behind these responses. Unlike the common societal and professional desire to dismiss these responses as merely negative, I believe we should examine them more closely. How is drinking serving you?

I often discuss what I call 'double trauma,' where current stress triggers a deeper, unresolved issue from the past. This dual-layer perspective is crucial: first, we address the immediate stressors; this is where most people begin.

I'm a firm believer in the inherent goodness of the world. The notion that refugees aim to usurp others' opportunities is a misconception. Excellence and dedication secure positions, not nationality. If a refugee excels, it's a call for self-improvement, not resentment. My goal is to demonstrate through our actions that coexistence is not only possible but enriching.

Syrian Swimmer & Refugee Advocate Who Competed in Olympics

The Olympics elevate this understanding; there, athletes' origins become secondary. You don't dwell on their life stories; their athletic prowess and the spirit of competition captivate you. The focus is on their dedication and the culmination of years, sometimes lifetimes, of preparation, free from the constraints of politics and geographical divides.

Syrian Swimmer & Refugee Advocate Who Competed in Olympics

For me, sports were a sanctuary, the only place where I felt at home, could connect with others, and navigate my life and pain. Providing sports opportunities to children, women, and men in these settings is vital. Our foundation aims to complement these efforts by introducing sports, emphasising not just participation in sports but also backing these athletes significantly.

Syrian Swimmer & Refugee Advocate Who Competed in Olympics

My resilience, I believe, is inherited from my parents. They, ordinary in every sense, achieved the extraordinary for us, their children, striving to offer opportunities they never had. They embodied perseverance, teaching me to distinguish a bad day from a bad life, to persist, and to adapt. My parents' immense influence, coupled with my stubbornness, shaped my journey.

Syrian Swimmer & Refugee Advocate Who Competed in Olympics

Swimming transcended mere physical activity. It served as a conduit for life lessons, embodying the essence of its beauty. It taught me discipline, respect for others, and how to navigate the fine line between friendship and competition. Upon arriving in Germany, swimming became my sanctuary during a time when I had no other home. It provided a common language that allowed me to connect with others effortlessly, facilitating a smoother integration into German society.

Syrian Swimmer & Refugee Advocate Who Competed in Olympics

Three years ago, we were managing 20 cases, but today, that number has escalated to 70. Since our inception, we've dealt with nearly 500 cases. Hostage-taking is an ancient practice and will persist for a long time. This training initiative has developed significantly over recent years, ensuring proper care and attention are afforded to these cases.

Envoy and Negotiator Who Was Held Hostage in Lebanon