From 600+ conversations with the world’s leading thinkers.
The way I prefer to think of perception is as a processor of active construction, a controlled hallucination. Everything we perceive is a kind of inference, a burst guess about what's out there.
I earn my living from coaching people how to fight… it may come as a surprise, therefore, to learn that until I was in my early twenties, I was terrified of fighting. I hated arguing, shouting, violence – all forms of conflict, basically. That's not unusual, of course, but to be honest, I was a bit of a wimp – or, as some of the kids in school liked to tell me, a pussy.
The truth is, any book about pets is really a book about humans. It's not about the pets themselves. I'm always amused when friends send me pictures of their dog or cat, because I'm tempted to write back and say, 'If you're not in the picture, it's a misrepresentation of what's going on.'
When we crafted that phrase, it was because we saw a similarity with physical fitness. If you work out today, you don't return home and declare, 'Great, I'm finished, I never have to exercise again.' Staying fit requires ongoing commitment. In the same vein, we've discovered that those with the strongest social bonds are the individuals who diligently nurture them.
By encouraging them to pay attention as they overeat, we can reduce the reward value of that habit to zero in just 10-15 sessions of eating. These are people who could have been overeating for decades, but their behaviour can change quickly.
I'm bad at grieving; perhaps that's why I keep going. Some call it resilience, but it's likely just escapism. When you keep moving, the wind moves behind you, and you leave behind who you once were and move towards something new.
So many of the things our culture pushes us to pursue for happiness don't actually work the way we think they will. Material possessions, more money—if you're on social media, you get this strong sense that you should go after more of everything and then you'll feel better.
Mill has this thoughtful chapter on freedom of thought, but it is all based on the assumption that you have the ability to think freely inside your mind and that part can't be penetrated. We are very porous now, and it isn't just through neurotechnology, it is through all modes of technology that are designed to interpret and change our cognitive and effective functioning.
We live downstream of a very high-quality tool for manipulating each other in a collaborative way, which has been augmented by the perverse incentives surrounding manipulating each other in a hostile way. The explosion in the number of people who are interacting with each other has- today- made the problem effectively unsolvable.
Bias means your mind, your experiences, and your knowledge is too narrow to take in and truly appreciate the person standing in front of you. We have to hold all humans in respect.
You need one strong relationship in your life to remain sane. You need a relationship that doesn't depend on digital transmission! You need somebody who you understand deeply, who you can talk to directly, who can give you a reality check when everything coming through your computer and phone is bewildering.
I do this thing- I say something out-loud–announce it to the public–and then I'm forced to do it because people are excited and I don't want to let them down.