From 600+ conversations with the world’s leading thinkers.
My mindset changed from thinking that tomorrow I may be freed, to realising that unless I did something myself, nobody would come and rescue me. One of the ways I gathered strength was by constantly plotting my escape.
There's a concept in psychology called naïve realism. We think we see the world perfectly and assume that everyone sees it the way we do. If they don't? if they disagree? Our assumption is that they are wrong, and that they are misinformed. It's a natural inclination we all have which stops us putting ourselves in the other's shoes.
Unlearning silence doesn't mean speaking incessantly—the world is far too noisy for that. Instead, it means understanding the difference between choosing to be silent and having silence imposed upon you. It's recognizing whether silence is additive or oppressive, whether it's reflective and generative or merely detracting.
I think social media is a great example of this. It feels a little bit like social connection, but I often joke that it's the 'NutraSweet' version—it seems good but doesn't deliver the psychological benefit we expect.
You create change in other people when you're totally honest, transparent, and authentic. When you show people who you really are, with all your flaws, with all your vulnerabilities...it moves them. People would come up to me crying and thanking me for telling the truth.
Space also taught me that when you think you're at 100% of your physical or mental capacity, you're not. We have enormous reserves within us (which we don't tap into for good reason), but we are all capable of pushing ourselves a lot further than we think.
The easiest way to understand noise is by thinking about measurements. Suppose you are measuring a line with a very fine ruler. You will expect some variability such that you will not get the same number every time when you measure. That variability is noise. In the mathematics of accuracy, the expression for total error is very simple and quite compelling. It is bias-squared plus noise-squared. Bias and noise are both contributing to error and in that equation, they do so on the same basis.
Success is different for everyone, but for me success has always been about finding meaning and personal fulfillment. While that may have meant different things at different times in my life, learning, making meaningful connections with people and helping others achieve this same level of satisfaction has been a sign of success for me.
The greatest risk often lies in people's biased perceptions of risk itself. These biases, both psychological and political, tend to lead to a dangerous underestimation of risk. Our advice, backed by data and methodologies we've developed, is focused on debiasing risk.
I went to see a psychiatrists and was like 'I think there's something wrong with my brain'. He diagnosed me fairly quickly as being a born overachiever. Born overachievement complex was my issue, and he said we can work on that. I said overachievement? That's a feature, not a bug. He's like yeah but it's not tenable. And I said no, no, I'm fine, I'm totally fine and he countered with the checkmate of 'but you're here'.
Just as you wouldn't want a surgeon to go from one operating theater to the next without having washed their hands, you don't want a manager to go from one context to the next without being in a position where they can actually do some good—or at least do no harm.
Don't base your identity on your opinions. This can be a perilous path because it makes it challenging to change your mind. Instead, it's preferable to root your identity in your values and character.