Psychology

Whenever I write a new song with somebody, it feels like the first time. I sometimes feel embarrassed, humiliated, like I don't know what I'm doing until we find a spark. You have to dare to go to this place where, even though you've done it before, it feels like you don't know what you're looking for until you find it.

Grammy-nominated music producer and songwriter behind major pop hits

Start doing things not for the end product, but for the impact on your heart, your brain, your life, and your health. Recognize that you've been conditioned to hate yourself and your creativity for the sake of a culture that does not care about you.

Life Coach, Author & Sociologist Known for Self-Acceptance Work

Look at Jeff Bezos telling his 1.5 million employees to 'wake up every morning terrified and stay terrified all day.' They're not getting rich; they're barely scraping by. Yet he wants them living in terror so he can get even richer. That's crazy. That's a crazy society and a crazy life.

Life Coach, Author & Sociologist Known for Self-Acceptance Work

Fear is like being shot out of a cannon. Imagine a car has fallen on someone I love—I get this clear, calm, intense bolt of energy. In that heightened state, I could lift the car off them (as has happened before in rare cases). Anxiety, on the other hand, is like being haunted. You never actually see what's scaring you—it's just a story in your head that never goes away.

Life Coach, Author & Sociologist Known for Self-Acceptance Work

I often joke that social media is the 'NutraSweet' version—it seems good but doesn't deliver the psychological benefit we expect. In fact, our use of technology can be a big opportunity cost on a lot of the stuff that truly matters for happiness.

Psychologist known for teaching popular "Science of Well-Being" course at Yale

These scorecards just lead us down a path of dissatisfaction, when in reality most things that truly matter for happiness can't be measured in any meaningful way. We should be more mindful of living in the moment rather than keeping tally marks that don't really serve us.

Psychologist known for teaching popular "Science of Well-Being" course at Yale

I think there's a big misconception—sometimes called 'toxic positivity' or 'good vibes only'—that a happy life is one where we only experience positive emotions. But that's just patently false. Evolutionarily speaking, our negative emotions serve a really important purpose: they cue us to take action.

Psychologist known for teaching popular "Science of Well-Being" course at Yale

I think these are all cases where our brains lie to us. It's not because they're doing something insidious or that there's some advantage to messing up our sense of happiness—it's just the normal processes of our brains sometimes go awry, and we end up not appreciating what we have as much as we could.

Psychologist known for teaching popular "Science of Well-Being" course at Yale

So many of the things our culture pushes us to pursue for happiness don't actually work the way we think they will. Material possessions, more money—if you're on social media, you get this strong sense that you should go after more of everything and then you'll feel better.

Psychologist known for teaching popular "Science of Well-Being" course at Yale

a compelling call to action that will stay with you long after you've turned the last page.

Motivational Speaker & Author of "The 5 Second Rule

When you understand that your perception shapes your experience, you stop fearing uncertainty. The fear of 'not knowing' comes from the worry that something bad might happen. But if things aren't inherently good or bad, then not knowing isn't something to be afraid of.

Harvard psychologist & researcher in mindfulness and the psychology of possibility

The last thing we want is to live like machines. Our research over the past 45+ years shows that when you're actively noticing, your neurons are firing, and that's literally and figuratively enlivening. And what do we do when we're having fun? We notice, we engage. So mindfulness is not just beneficial—it's enjoyable.

Harvard psychologist & researcher in mindfulness and the psychology of possibility

If we treat the mind and body as one unit, then wherever we put the mind, we necessarily put the body—and that opens up enormous possibilities for control.

Harvard psychologist & researcher in mindfulness and the psychology of possibility

I want to free everyone from that misconception. You can't know everything. And when you shift from a personal attribution for not knowing—thinking, 'I don't know, but everyone else seems to, so I'll fake it or avoid the situation'—to a universal attribution—realizing, 'I don't know, you don't know, nobody knows'—you stand taller. This allows you to embrace what I believe is the most successful mindset: confident uncertainty.

Harvard psychologist & researcher in mindfulness and the psychology of possibility

Why does this matter? Because when you're mindless—assuming 1+1 is always 2—you don't notice context, and you don't have choices. But when you're mindful, you do. If someone asks you how much 1+1 is, you get to decide: do I answer 1, 2, 10, or something else? You become aware, engaged, and flexible.

Harvard psychologist & researcher in mindfulness and the psychology of possibility

I recall attending an annual event at the Albert Hall hosted by the Institute of Directors. The chairman, at 75, admitted he'd changed his mind—success, he concluded, truly lies in your ability to connect and resonate emotionally with people, thereby inspiring them to action.